Trekathon 527: Profit and Lace (DS9)

The worst Ferengi episode yet, as Quark dresses in drag to save the Grand Nagus.

Terrible moments:

* Quark sexually harassing an employee.

* The continued inherent sexism of Ferengi society.

* “The headquarters of the sole legitimate government of Ferenginar” (whatever happened to the Ferengi Alliance?)

* The Nagus’s idiotic plan to win his position back.

* “Lobekins”

* “She’s Rom’s wife” “Meaning what?” “Meaning she’s broke”.

* Sluggo Cola – sounds like something from Futurama, not Star Trek. And then they sing the theme song.

* The endless repetition of “Acting Grand Nagus”.

* “Evil feminist tune”.

* Quark shouts his mother into a coma.

* The Nagus’s even more idiotic plan to win his position back through Quark in drag.

* Quark dressed as a woman – I need to go burn my eyeballs now.

* Everything else about Quark dressed as a woman.

* “The slimiest cola in the galaxy”.

* The terrible terrible ‘comic tuba’ in the soundtrack for the episode.

* “Under all these clothes I’m totally naked” “I’ll try and remember that”.

* “When it comes to profit, I’m your girl”.

* “I’m all ears” said by a Ferengi.

* “Drink some cola and keep your teeth a lovely shade of green”.

* Quark gets sexually harassed himself – oh irony, how painful you are when forced. And then sexually assaulted. Hilarious.

* “That is not a female” “She’s close enough for me”.

* “You’re being overly sensitive” “Well I’ve only been a male again for a few hours” – well done, way to underline the actual sexism of the writers, beyond the pretend sexism of the Ferengi.

* Oh, and it turns out that sexual harassment of your employees is endearing. Good message there.

Good moments:

* “A Dominion invasion of Ferenginar – think of the terrible consequences to the Alpha quadrant” “I cannot think of any”. Sadly, this quote also raised my hopes about the plot of the episode.

The nicest thing to say is that I’m not *completely* sure that it’s the worst episode of Star Trek of all time. It might be, I’m just not sure yet.

527 down, 210 to go.